Saying Last Good-Byes to Friends and a City

Thursday, Sept. 10, 2009--Copenhagen

This is my last visit planned to Copenhagen. For 25 years I have been coming here--for a total of 3-5 months a year split into two visits when Arne was alive and 1 visit per year for about 8 days for the last 5 years since his death. The latter has been possible because of my around-the-world tickets which made it easy to continue to stop and see the city and my friends. However, the around-the-world trips are coming to an end. No. 10 is the end. That makes this the last planned trip to Copenhagen. I may return in 3-4 years or so as a part of a trip to see parts of Europe that I still want to visit, but that will depend on the value of the dollar, the availability of free tickets using frequent flier points, etc. Therefore, this week has been a week of saying good-byes.

Today was my day to say good-bye to Old Grethe. She is 86 years old and has been having health problems recently. I have known her since the beginning having met her during the first week I was here. She was Arne's closest friend from when he was only 18 years old, and we saw her often. She came to Texas in 1986 for a trip which she often refers to as the trip of her life. She has always been an active woman who kept up with technology, read lots of books, had lots of friends, etc. But about 4 years ago she started developing macular degeneration. Over the years, she has lost most of her sight, had to give up her computer, had to stop reading and watching TV, etc. Furthermore, she has back problems and has fallen. Although she resisted it, she now has home help for shopping, for reading and writing correspondence, for cleaning the apartment and for delivering hot meals. It is difficult for her to accept what has happened to her, but she maintains a positive attitude saying that she was lucky that she was fine until she was 82. As with my previous visits for the past few years, we talked about our friendship. We talked about her trip to Texas. We talked about missing Arne. My guess is that she will not be here when I return in the future, so it was difficult to say good-bye. I did not tell her it was my last visit, though. Instead, I told her I would continue to come to see her each time I am in Denmark. As usual, she was standing in her window waving to me from her 3rd floor apartment even though she could not see me as I walked away.

On the way back to Nurse Grethe's apartment, I passed Domus Vista, the apartment where Arne and I lived for the 20 years we were together. I entered and walked through the lobby while hoping not to see anyone who would recognize me. I entered the supermarket and looked through the front of it without entering further beyond. Then I set off across the parking lot to leave it all behind. So much has changed in 5 years.

Paulette, my Jamaican friend who was a colleague of Arne's invited Grethe and me to dinner Thursday night. She lives in a wonderful old-style apartment which she has decorated with bright paintings and nice furnishings. It was a wonderful evening of being together with great conversation and food. We started the night with Jamaican rum punch--a mixture of several juices and Jamaican rum. Then we went to the dinner table for shrimp cocktails and white wine. Then the excitement began. Paulette and cooked Jamaican lamb curry--a nice mixture of spices and lamb in a sauce. We had it over basmati rice with salad and papadams on the side. It left our lips and tongues tingling!! Afterwards, we had ice cream with prunes in rum. Paulette and Grethe both had to be at work the next morning, so we had to call it an early evening. Paulette hates to fly, but at least I could leave her hoping that she may stop in Texas some day when she makes a trip to Jamaica and to Florida to see her family.

Friday, Sept. 11, 2009--Copenhagen

Grethe was expecting delivery of a new sofa and chair today. I volunteered to stay at the apartment to accept delivery. I needed to do some catch-up work anyway in terms of planning my travels. I now have reservations for a hotel in Fes and another in Barcelona.

When Grethe got here at 14:00, the furniture still was not here. We waited until 16:00, the deadline for when it was to be delivered, before she called. They apologized and told her they should be here no later than 17:15. We were invited to dinner with Jens and Robert at 18:00.

I left early to see Jens and Robert, since they were having a problem with their e-mail program which they thought I could solve, while Grethe stayed to take delivery of the furniture and then ride her bike to join us for dinner. The problem seemed to be related to the server of a a friend. E-mails were coming back saying that a connection could not be made with free.fr to deliver them.

Grethe was able to arrive just at 18:00 and just before the other guests, Kurt and Finn. We all sat on the glass-enclosed balcony to have a welcome drink of sparkling wine. Then we moved to the dining table for the meal. The first course was shrimp coctails with white wine. After that, we continued with white wine while having fresh salmon poached in Noilly Prat with salt, pepper, lemon. That was served with warm, crusty Italian bread and with potato salad made with sliced, boiled new potatoes, chopped red onion, oil, and vinegar. We switched to red wine at some point during the meal. For dessert, we had port wine with a strawberry cream tart.

As usual when Kurt is present, there were plenty of funny stories. Grethe was teased often. I was teased some. A little after 23:00, however, it was time to say good-bye. It was very difficult, since Jens and Robert and Kurt and Finn have been among my best friends for all these years. It seems impossible that I may not be seeing them again in the future.

I got my first look at Grethe's new sofa and chair when we returned to her apartment. They have a natural wood frame and are upholstered in a black wool fabric. They are very nice and very attractive. She has adopted the chair as her special place to sit, so guests will be sitting on the sofa when they come.

Saturday, Sept. 12, 2009--Copenhagen

Grethe and I did some re-arranging around the apartment this morning. I helped her reposition her rug in the living room so that the legs of the sofa were on it and so that it was away from the wall leaving some of the wooden flooring to be seen around the edges.

I spent part of the morning starting to organize my suitcase for my travels tomorrow. I am trying to pack some of the things that I still have stored here. And I am getting rid of some of the others that I cannot use or cannot fit into the bag. After a week here, almost everything had come out of the bag and needed to be repositioned for the first time since I left Texas.

Arne's niece Gitte, her husband Carit, their daughter Sascha, and her boyfriend Kristian are planning a trip to Texas in the spring of next year. They invited me to lunch today to discuss plans for the trip. They set out a typical, huge Danish buffet for making open-faced sandwiches. They had white bread and two kinds of brown bread. They had butter for spreading on the breads. There were pickled herrings, curried herrings, smoked salmon, boiled shrimps, fried fish filets, fried tenderloin, pate with fried bacon and mushrooms, etc. We drank snaps and soft drinks. I had pear cider. Afterwards, we had cheeses with crackers, then chocolates and candies.

The main purpose for our get-together, however, was to discuss the trip to Texas. They talked about what they thought they might want to do. I asked them questions. By the time I left, we had a general plan for their visit breaking it into 3 parts--a couple of days when they first arrive, an out-of-town trip for a week, then a week back in San Antonio during Fiesta San Antonio. I gave them a long list of topics to research on the Internet to help them decide what they would like to see and do while there.

Grethe insisted on cooking a farewell dinner for tonight. I had suggested that we just make sandwiches from leftovers that she has in her refrigerator. However, she baked a whole chicken which she had stuffed with parsley, spread with butter, and sprinkled with garlic powder. She made a salad with lettuce, tomatoes, cucumber, peppers, and feta cheese to go with it and baked a crusty flute of bread. We started with a gin and tonic and then shared a beer with the meal. She is now making coffee and serving it with one of our favorite Danish pastries--dagmar tærte.